He sees Jesus, not my sin

I come into His presence beaten down, battered, bloody, bruised. 

I have nothing left.. My strength is gone. 

Ashamed and downcast, I do not look Him in the face. 

How could anyone ever love me? How can He love me?

If only they knew all the things I have done.. 

Then suddenly I realize He knows.

Even when I hid my sin from everyone else..

Jesus. still. knew.

I start trembling, not daring to move.

Then in the silence that follows He begins to speak to me.

I'm surprised. His words are not of anger as I would expect, 

but of love, grace and sadness.

"My Child, why do you turn your face away?

Yes, you have hurt Me with your disobedience 

and have saddened Me by continuing in your sin.

It breaks My heart that you won't let me in to help you!

But Child, don't you know that I still love you?!

No matter what you ever do, I will always love you!

You can never earn my love, so stop trying to!

It's a gift.. just accept it."

Do I dare to look into His face?!

As I lift my head, 

my body begins to shake as my entire being weeps.

"Father..."

A whisper that is barely audible.. 

But He hears. 

"Father, I have nothing to give you!

All my strength is gone; 

I can barely stand, much less do work to further Your kingdom!

I hurt You again and again, over and over.. 

Yet, You say that You love me?!"

This time, when He speaks,

it feels like I am being pulled into an embrace.. 

And I will never be let go.

I feel safe, protected, loved.

"My Child, you can never earn My love!

So stop trying! It is a gift to you-just accept it.

You do not have to be strong and mighty; 

With your life all together for Me to love you. 

You do not have to give me anything, but yourself. 

Give Me your life and let Me work in you and change you.

Just surrender your entire life to Me."

Then I understand.. 
It was never about earning and deserving; 
But believing and accepting.
About humbling myself to receive His forgiveness;
Having the humility to let Him change me from the inside out.
Because once I'm His, God no longer sees my sin, 

He. sees. Jesus.

Who took my place and stands in my place of condemnation.
So no longer am I condemned...
but stand holy and forgiven.